What's logical, when it comes to emotion?
by Cinn
Summary: Sequel to What vucans hide. Will T'Pol and Archer finally get together? You'll have to read to find out. (I've warned all you tuckert'pol people before hand this time seeing as though you got really cross with me last time!) FINISHED.
1. Acknowledging her feelings

Cinn: I highly doubt I made you think this was never going to come, but I might have... Awaited sequel of What Vulcans Hide, of which I had a strange urge to post this early. Will T'Pol give into her feelings? Will T'Pol and Archer finally get together? Well just read the fic and you'll find out.

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T'Pol's pov, again; acknowledging her feelings.

* * *

It' been a week since the Therdorian attack. Repairs are underway, although we took no serious damage that put our mission on hold; we do have big sections of the ship that need repairing. So far decks e-g has been sealed off, due to hull breach. Phase canons are off-line for a further 4 hours, and then Lieutenant Reed expects to have them back on-line. Also decks a-b have been sealed off because of and explosion due to a too closer missile penetration. Also some of the crew have had to be moved to temporary cabins until these problems are sorted. And the Captain happens to be sharing mine.

He came to ask whether he could share the same quarters as me, I said yes because he was only trying to rebuild our friendship. So far the only physical contact we have is brushing against each other in the corridor or passing an object over to one another. Our friendship, I believe, is at a very dangerous position.

I believe that humans used to stay over at each others houses for various nights when they were younger, and quite often they would sleep head to toe, I suggested sleeping like this, but he declined and said he preferred sleeping on the floor. But I believe that it is because he cannot bear and physical contact more than was we already do. Ashamed of what happened over a week ago.

I need to meditate again; I can feel my emotions threatening to take over again.

End Log.

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Cinn: Yet again, I'm leaving it at the end of a log entry. What is it with me and doing that? Don't know. But anyway, what do you think, would love to know, so review. Please. And is it me, or did T'Pol act a bit different than normal when she found out that Archer 'n' Malcolm, were gonna be hanged in The Communicator? I think it may be getting somewhere, unless I'm the only one who noticed this... Anyone else think that? She took a risk too. Not very T'Pol like... please tell me I'm not the only one who thought see looked a bit troubled and affected by this!


	2. Meditation, with a difference

Cinn: Carries immediately on from the last chappie. Read, enjoy, and reveiw.

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T'Pol's pov, again; Meditation, with a difference.

* * *

I lit my meditation candle, and had just sat down when he entered our shared, for the time being, quarters.

"Oh, have I interrupted you, T'Pol?"

"Not at all, Captain."

"I think I'll leave you on your own for a few moments..."

"No stay. You're quite welcome to."

"Well, if you insist."

He sat down on my bunk, obviously going to watch me to see how I meditated. I was quite happy for him to do this, but my feelings for him kept going through my mind. I had no idea how this was going to affect my meditation. I realized it did in a big way when I'd finished. I blew out my candle, and looked up at him; he looked shocked to say the least.

"T'Pol, isn't your meditation supposed to repress emotions?"

"Yes."

"It doesn't seem to have worked."

"No, it is difficult sometimes; it appears this is one of those times."

"Would you like me to leave you in peace for a while?"

"No, it wouldn't make much difference."

"You're sure?"

"Quite sure."

I went to sit next to him; he moved thinking I wanted to sleep. I stopped him easily, I may be female, but I have twice his strength.

"I want to talk."

"About what, T'Pol?"

"Our friendship."

"Oh. In your current emotional status, is this the best of times?"

"In this sate, it is one of the best times."

"I don't see how it figures."

"Captain, I know we both feel deeply for each other, and it is beginning to affect our friendship."

"Beginning? It affected our friendship that day, T'Pol."

"I know, but it is getting worse."

"That's the funny thing about friendships, sometimes problems are overlooked, sometimes not."

"Could we over look this problem?"

"We can try. But it's not always that simple to over look a day like that one."

"Captain, I believe you and I are talking about different things."

"What are you talking about?"

"I was talking about this past week."

"You mean..."

"I mean that I think a relationship between the two of us could work."

"T'Pol, only 1 week ago you said that it was a dangerous thing. And your emotional state is affecting your decisions. "

"You mean that we shouldn't."

"I'm saying that you should wait till you're properly mediated until you say something like that. Because if you then meditate and you change your mind, it could be after something, very personal and intimate. This would not only affect our friendship in a very big way, but could possibly make it so we may never be friends again. "

"You're right Captain. I shouldn't have suggested it. You are still cross with me from when I pushed you away."

"T'Pol, I was never cross with you for doing that. I also never said that I didn't want to be in a relationship with you, I just don't want my heart breaking. I'm still only human."

"Oh, I know you're human. But I am becoming more human, believe me Captain, you even said so yourself. But do you think it could ever come to a relationship?"

"It might."

"You still want to sleep on the floor?"

"I think it would be best."

"It's your decision. I would offer you a spot on my bunk. But you decline every time."

"Just for both our comforts."

He settled down on his favored floor spot, and I lay down on my bunk. I only hoped that tomorrow's meditation would go better and we could talk without me being under the wrong, maybe right, influence. But what if it was the wrong influence, that doesn't explain the constant need for him to be near me. We need each other I can tell, but we may never get to that.

* * *

Cinn: End for now, it's not the end of the fic, just chappie! I know that T'Pol's meditation would be affected, I know how to meditate! So if I get any comments on that being wrong, look in a yoga book to find out how to meditate. No I don't actually meditate, just know how... Also are they both in character? I'm not too sure about that either, even though T'Pol was being fairly emotional, I tried my best. I tried to get her in a more emotional character, but still fairly normal character, if you get what I mean...?


	3. Bridge Shift gone wrong

Cinn: More goings on between Archer and T'Pol, I mean come on, they SHOULD be together!

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T'Pol's pov, again; Bridge shift gone wrong.

* * *

"DeckG has been reopened sir."

"Thank-you ensign, Go back to engineering and find out when the other 3..."

"4 Captain, 4"

"Thanks T'Pol." He turned back round to the ensign "Next 4 decks will be reopened."

"Captain, doctor Phlox wanted to speak with you..."

"What now? Shock me."

"He wants to know when we'll be able to pick up more medical supplies, we're running low."

"Tell him when we find a medical shop."

"Captain, the chances of finding a medical shop are very slim."

"Sub-commander. It's called sarcasm. Tell him, when we find some."

"Phase canons back on-line sir."

"Thank-you Lieutenant. One good thing had to happen today. Anymore faults with them going to happen?"

"No sir."

That evening...

"T'Pol. Would you like me to leave? Last time I was here and you were meditating, it didn't go to well."

"No Captain, doesn't leave, in fact come and sit here."

I pointed to the cushion in front of me, on the other side of my meditation candle.

"T'Pol?"

"Yes?"

"What are you planning?"

"I was planning on teaching you how to meditate."

"Why?"

"Because on the bridge today you were very frustrated, I thought it would help."

"So you think I can't handle myself without this?"

"No, I didn't' say that Captain. I'm only trying to help."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"I understand, you've have a hard time, we all have."

I stood up completely forgetting about my meditation to walk over to where he was standing.

"You haven't meditated have you?"

"No. It slipped my mind."

He smiled at that, obviously thinking that Vulcans can't be human at all. We can, at the few moments before we normally mediate we are very much like humans. He left then so I could get on with my meditating. But several hours later he still hadn't returned, I went in search of him and found him in the mess hall staring out of the window.

"Captain?"

"What?"

"What is it you find so interesting about the stars?"

"It's just a human thing."

"Which is?"

"We look for a pattern in the stars, I was seeing if I could spot any."

"It may surprise you to know, but Vulcans do the same thing. We have many constellations."

"It doesn't seem like the Vulcans to do that..."

"We used them to navigate through our planet. Quite a few people still do, and some are from before Surok's teachings."

"Who's teachings?"

"Surok, he's the Vulcan prophet. He's the one who brought the teachings on emotion."

"That must be from a long time ago. So he's the fellow who taught you all to repress your emotions."

"He is. It may surprise you to know Captain, but deep, deep inside Vulcans are in many ways just like humans."

"I'm beginning to find that out."

* * *

Cinn: Liked? And yes it is true that they are! Anyone should know that, in particular if you watched the original Star Trek and Voyager. OK, _mainly_ the original one, but whatever.


	4. Repairs, almost, finished

Cinn: I do not see how playing minesweeper helps writing this fic, but it does, seriously. And I'm addicted to minesweeper. Oh well here's the chappie in which HOPEFULLY they finally get together.

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T'Pol's pov, again; Repairs, almost, finished.

* * *

3 days later...

It's been 5 days since I suggested a relationship between the two of us, he said we might get there, but if we do. I don't think it'll be in the near future, or will it? The repairs are complete, just about. We haven't all gone back to our quarters yet, we're doing a set routine so the corridors don't get over crowded, and to avoid injuries that might happen if that is a case.

He's come to get his belongings that he brought with him, not much. Porthose was left in sick bay, because there wasn't enough room in this small cabin for 3 beings, there was barely enough room for the two of us.

"I suppose I have to thank you for giving up your personal space for this past week or so."

"I don't see why."

"Well, thanks for sharing your room."

"Captain, and before you ask yes I have meditated, is our friendship fully repaired?"

"I believe it is, why?"

"Because I was wondering about how we feel for each other."

"But you said so yourself that it's not allowed."

"That was before my feelings became too much to handle."

"So you're telling me that meditating isn't working anymore?"

"Yes, that's what I'm saying."

It felt strange admitting that my emotions would be quite clear, it must have made him feel more equal. I'd probably never admit that to anyone else.

"T'Pol...?"

"Captain, it's the only way..."

"You can read my thoughts!"

"To a certain extent."

"Well we can't have you getting away with that."

He said that trying to be stern, but because he bent down to kiss me at that moment he couldn't. But as he pushed me down onto the small bunk I had inhabited for the past 10 days, I wondered whether we really could solve everything through this, and have a future at the same time without BIG complications.

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Cinn: Liked? It may seem the end, but it's not, there is one shorter chapter after this. Weird I know, but then so am I. I apologise for the shortness. When I've finished this fic, I'll _try_ to get on to a long trekky fic. And I've been meaning to say this for a while, even though I _know_ ENTgirl ain't reading this... You said these sorta pairings degrade women. Well did it ever cross your mind to read my bio, and you might find that I AM A GIRL! Sorry, just had to say it. It's true though...


	5. Facing the truth

Cinn: Last chappie, well I said that this one was last time, didn't I? When I FINALLY got them together, took a while. But then again it always takes me ages to write the part I want. On my first fic took me 11 chapters to kill someone off! Well the less said about that the better. Well last chappie from this fic.

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T'Pol's pov, again; facing the truth.

* * *

I cannot believe that I let myself go with my emotional instincts. The truth is that we both realise that we shouldn't have done this, and shouldn't carry on. But we can't, we can't just stop here. After we've risked everything, can we? I'd probably get over it fairly easily, but him?

I don't really know what I was thinking when I let him proceed. But I wanted it to, so I guess I thought it didn't matter. It's not that I wish we hadn't or anything, but I don't want the high council to find out and then reassign me. And they wouldn't just reassign me, they'd take away my rank and I might even become an outcast from the Vulcan science team. But both our careers are at stake, we both know that. But he can't just ignore his feelings; I can to a certain extent, but not always. The very strongest of emotions can always show.

I do believe I asked myself a question 11 days ago, the time has come to answer it, What do I do? Pursue this relationship, and hope it turns out for the best. Or say it was wrong and it was just something I did because I wasn't myself, thus risk loosing his friendship too.

I have made a few friends whilst on board enterprise. Most I believe still are my friends. But the Captain, to me, has always been slightly more than a friend. I never knew a Vulcan could feel like this, it might be because I've spent the past 3 years around humans, and their emotions. I don't know. But what I do know is that it's made me stronger, and has given me a better understanding of humans, therefore understanding their choices better too, and when they're right, or wrong.

I also know that this isn't the most logical thing, but what's logical about humans? Not much and especially not this. I want this as much as him, only I take the time to see what could go terrible wrong. He knows, and has taken a little time to look at those things, but he doesn't know the full extend of them.

It's like there's a more emotional Vulcan inside me, breaking out of a shell accumulated from years of meditating, to stop harm coming to the being, ready to face life at it's full. That's how I feel, I know I shouldn't and it's not logical for me to, but it can't always be helped. I don't know what human exactly call this feeling, but I'm guessing it's what they call love. But I've been taught that love blinds your choices, that ALL emotions blind your choices.

I need him, he needs me. We're supposed to be. I'm not finishing it here. I'll proceed unless it gets terribly out of hand, when it'll defiantly be time for us to finish our relationship. We, love, each other.

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Cinn: liked? I doubt there'll be another sequel, but there'll probably be another couple fics pairing the two up. I'd love to know what you think, not many people reply to the last chapter of fic, but I'm hoping YOU will.


	6. Author note, please read

Cinn: This is an a/n. Thanking all you supportive people who flamed my fic. And by the way, that was sarcastic, the rest isn't. I don't believe in flames, and I certainly don't believe in anonymous flames. They just portray the flamer as a whim. And I know I said that thing about a human stepping out of a Vulcan shell thing. But if Vulcans didn't meditate then humans and Vulcans would be practically the same! I'm I the only one who can see that! (Please don't take offence if you do too). Anyhow, I thank all the people who properly reviewed reminding me about the title error, even though AFTER I'd changed it you didn't need to keep telling me. And ENTgirl it doesn't degrade women, and I'm not sexist. I'm a blooming feminist and I'm not ashamed to be part of the human race. Nor am I afraid to say what I mean/feel. Everyone has rights, and I know you're probably going to use that against me and say that T'Pol has rights too, and bla bla bla.

And Zhuge Liang, if you hated my fic, and want to sue me for wasting your time, why didn't you just not read it? I didn't force you to read it? And I'm not saying she WANTS to be human. And does someone please care to remind me which episode Twilight was? I don't remember many of the titles.

And for all you wimpy flamers who are too afraid to leave their account name, I apologies if you don't have an account, well if you respond to this a/n please care to leave you account name. I like to know who flames me, and it doesn't automatically mean I'll flame you back. I'm not that sort of person. You may be.

Thanks for reading this,

Cinn.


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